Is Shaka Fault!!!

OK, so this is a relatively late post, but I've been grading all day and am now at the point where I wish to strangle 51% of my class, but more about that another day. OK, you know what, I was just thinking about a post that Mad Bull did about the new fighting robots that the military plan to deploy in Iraq, I think they're called SWORDS or something to that effect. Anyhow, for some reason I began to think about war in general, and somehow I came up with the idea that Africans had the right idea about early warfare until the birth and subsequent rise of Shaka, king of the Zulus.

Now, if the hit miniseries "Shaka Zulu" is anything to go on, one would note that wars were more like sports for the Africans back in the day. Each tribe would bring their families, their weapons, and so on. The battle pretty much was something to the effect of each side throwing spears which, more times than not, would miss the intended targets and even if the target was hit the probability of a fatal blow would be extremely low (though not impossible). In the meantime, tribes would punctuate the heat of the battle by taunting each other while eating food and drinking juice. At the end of the day, whatever the war was over would magically be resolved, now that's my type of war!

Now, imagine if our local gangstas (or shottas as we Jamaicans sometimes call them) had that same perspective? Imagine, a Jamaican turf war where you would bring your case of Red Stripe, pan chicken, and roast pork! Imagine seeing the local dons and their people wetting up each other with anything from super-soakers to water balloons. Or better yet, imagine police and criminals involved in harmless paintball shootouts all day long and at the end of the day both parties collectively decide whether or not the criminals should go to jail. Oh what a wonderful world that would be! Less death by violence, more festivities, and an all-round good time! No, I'm not high, I'm just sick and tired of all the war, crime, and fear that terrorizes our nation. There has to be a better way, there just has to be. I haven't lost my faith in humanity just yet.

Anyhow, have a good day folks!

Comments

Anonymous said…
WTF did they feed this poor dog last night? Stew peas? 'Cause the ideas that you express in this post must be from some very vivid dream my yute. It naw happen. Here's more evidence that this turf gang warfare naw go done to ra$$claat! SIGH! Bigtime. Dr. D. Tek it easy.
Scratchie said…
Look who was talking bout spliff smoking. Somebody had a big one before posting :-).

I would like to see the same, dog. Unfortunately I'm also a realist. so I won't hold my breath.
Melody said…
Psychiatrists get PAID to let couples whack out their anger at each other wif harmless nerf batons, so you've got a point. Da Piggy knows where yu comin' from, Doggy, yu heart's in de right place--if only de powers that be felt like we do, there might be less murder an' mayhem. All great men dreamt great dreams. "You're a dreamer, but you're not de only one, maybe some day, they'll join us, an' de world will live as one." Sounds CORNY but it's quite TRUE!
Jdid said…
good idea but it not going to work. still we live and dream dog
Great post, I'm digging it..