The Mysteries of Women

Arf, Arf, A Bright and Glorious Monday Morning to you all! This is Angry Dog on the air coming at you with lyrical agility and philosophical insight that will make even Aristotle pee himself.

The topic of today's blog is entitled "The Mysteries of Women". See, I was sitting around in my kennel this morning, just chewing on a bone and minding my own business when a thought suddenly hit me--what exactly do women want? Now, the Angry Dog of yesteryear, who was the biggest narcissist ever, would probably have said "women want me". However, Angry Dog Version 2k+4 is a little bit older, a little bit wiser, and a little more experienced in the ways of the world [one would hope].

At any rate, the truth is that Angry Dog doesn't know what women want; however, Angry Dog knows that women sometimes tend to have the same insecurities as guys. For example, back in the days when I was a young pup strutting my stuff around the campus of E* Community College, I used to get along really well with the ladies...I liked talking to them, and they seemed to like talking to me. However, the Angry Dog just didn't seem to have what it takes to have a girlfriend.

You see, though I could talk to the girls, I really couldn't go any further than that...you know, asking them out on dates and that kind of thing--I was too shy and didn't think that girls would really be interested in me. Flash forward to five years after Community College and I'm hanging out at a gas station [of all places] when I run into a chick I had a mad crush on back in the day. We get to talking and she asks me why I never asked her out, so I told her I was shy. She looks at me and tell me that she had a mad crush on me too, but she just thought I wouldn't be interested in a girl like her.

I would've thought this behavior to be an anomaly, except over the years I've met many other girls from Community College days who told me the same thing--"we had a crush on you, but we were just too shy to come talk to you" or "I thought that *insert your favorite girl's name here* was trying to get with you, so we didn't think we had a chance."

That's when it hit me that women tend to be as insecure as guys when it comes to dealing with someone they're interested in. However, the major difference is that society has put pressure on men to be the ones to make the first move. So, women grow up with expectations that if a man doesn't try to make the effort get with the girl, then he's not interested and men grow up with the expectations that they have to try and get the girl, but if the girl is way to attractive then the chances of him getting shot down will be greater [based on precedents already established]. Furthermore, we are also pre-disposed to thinking that if a woman attempts to make the first move, she's too easy and therefore a "loose" person.

So, I say screw it all--the way I feel about things as a man [errr....dog], is that women have proven to us time and time again that they are equal to, or greater than, men in all respects. So, I don't see why it should be such a big deal if a woman is the one to take the initiative and ask the guy out. Personally, my life would be much easier if all the guesswork was taken out of dating! I mean, sure, it's good to have some mystery, but waiting around forever wondering if you should make your move is just a senseless waste of time!!! but that's just my opinion.

{arf, arf}

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